It’s mid-November, and you know what that means: the holiday season is literally right around the corner. I’m looking forward to having some time off for Thanksgiving next week, but still–the holidays can be just plain overwhelming.
That means it’s time to start getting yourself prepared for the holiday rush. Once Thanksgiving is upon us, everything moves too quickly to be managed–now is the time to do what you can to make your holidays a pleasant experience. Next week, I’ll be offering some thoughts about how introverts can survive the holiday season with a minimum of trauma. For now, I offer these suggestions for holiday prep.
Make multiple lists and check them twice.
I’m a list-maker by nature, which is one of the reasons I was so pleased to find the List Maker app. (It’s also available for iPhone, by the way.) List Maker has a convenient little check box feature that lets me feel a sense of accomplishment when I get something done, and it lets me keep track of multiple lists without carrying around multiple pieces of paper.
I make lists of gifts I’ve already purchased, gifts I need to purchase (particularly handy if you have friends or family members celebrating birthdays during the holiday season), as well as holiday meal shopping lists and To Do lists by specific day (to make sure all the things on other lists get done). Checking things off a list helps me feel a sense of control when life gets hectic. I’m nerdy that way.
Get events on the calendar.
For years, we’ve kept a family calendar at our “family command center.” That sounds fancy, but it’s really just a bulletin board for important documents, baskets that served as drop-off and pick-up spots for papers that needed a signature (no longer a necessary part of the command center, now that our kids are grown), and a calendar where each of us can track our commitments.
The calendar allows us to see which events conflict with each other. When we receive an invitation, if there’s already an event on the calendar that makes it impossible to attend another, we can send our regrets immediately. If we need to attend two functions by cutting each one short, we can plan ahead. Google calendar can function in this same way, if you create a group calendar, but I like having a physical family calendar.
Check your expectations.
I’m the family chef. I like cooking and shopping for groceries, so this isn’t a problem–and Mike takes care of the kitchen clean-up, which is the part of cooking I hate. This year, however, it occurred to me that I have a grown daughter with her own apartment who could make a contribution to the family Thanksgiving meal. When did I have that revelation? When she asked “Is there anything you want me to bring when I come for Thanksgiving?” It didn’t even occur to me that someone else might help out.
If you’ve always done things a certain way, maybe it’s time to ask yourself whether it has to be that way. This year, I asked each person who will be at our Thanksgiving dinner to choose a favorite side dish. Some of the usual fare won’t be on the table, but that’s all right–the fact that we aren’t eating it on Thanksgiving day doesn’t mean we won’t eat it at all.
Start shopping, if you haven’t already.
I’ll be honest: I hate shopping for anything other than groceries. And because I hate it, I tend to put it off. I am not one of those people looking for great gift buys in July. But doing your shopping at the last minute, when everything is picked over and the stores are crowded with people who really don’t want to be there, makes an unpleasant task even less appealing. I’ve found two solutions to this problem: online shopping, and buying things whenever I see them offered at a reasonable price.
Lots of people wait to make a purchase, on the theory that the price will go down even further as the holidays approach–and while that might be true, I find the unpleasantness of endless shopping far outweighs the pleasure of getting the best deal. When I see a gift at a price I can afford, I buy it. If the price goes down later, chances are I won’t even notice, because I’m done shopping. And if I do notice–maybe I kick myself for buying it earlier, but probably not. The purpose of holiday gift-buying is to purchase something your friend or family member will enjoy. If you get a bargain in the process, great. If not–well, you’ve still made your loved one happy. That’s the point.
Create a self-care schedule you can stick to.
For me, self-care includes taking time to go the gym, or for a walk or run in my neighborhood. It also includes having some quiet time alone. Now is the time to figure out how to fit self-care activities into your holiday schedule.
When week nights are overtaken by holiday concerts and parties, that might mean getting up early to go to the gym. When your weekends are booked up as well, that might mean moving household chores from Saturday morning to another day of the week, so you aren’t sacrificing self-care for quality time with the vacuum cleaner (or driving yourself crazy by watching a stampede of dust bunnies.) Whether you create a schedule week by week, depending on what your calendar looks like, or a schedule that will last throughout the holiday season, do whatever it takes to take care of yourself. And when it feels self-indulgent, keep in mind that you’re actually doing yourself–and everyone who sees you at those holiday events–a great kindness.
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