Lessons Learned from 2016

I don’t have to tell you it’s been a difficult year, right? I think we’re all in agreement on that point. But in spite of the fact that I really don’t believe adversity is a good thing, I do believe there are lessons to be learned even from the darkest parts of our lives.

So, to wrap up the year, here’s a list of some lessons I’ve learned from 2016.

Life is short.

Take a look at the list of people who died this year–many of whom were nowhere near the age where their deaths might have seemed inevitable. One of Mike’s colleagues died last spring. Our dear neighbor passed away suddenly in August.

If I’ve learned one thing from 2016, it’s that none of us should count on being able to get things done tomorrow. Whatever you think is really important–do that now. If it’s not so important, give your time and energy to the things that are, while you can.

Time is a gift.

Mike and I took a week-long trip to Antigua in late May–our very long-delayed honeymoon. And while Antigua was a beautiful place, the real gift of that vacation was the concentrated amount of time we spent together. When you’ve gone through graduate school together, raised two children together, managed a household together, etc., you tend to forget that being together just requires two people. You also forget that the joy of simply spending time with each other was the starting point for the journey.

Our trip was a good reminder that we started out as two people who enjoyed hanging out with each other–and if we’re really lucky, that’s how we’ll end up.

My voice matters.

In October, I published this Open Letter to the Good Guys. It appeared on Huffington Post Women as well as She Dwells, which means it reached a larger audience than my work usually does. I’m still getting email (and tweets, and comments) in response to this piece, both positive and not-so-kind. And while it’s never fun to be called names, or told that you clearly have personal issues, or marked as the cause of the decline of the American family, the fact remains that what I wrote had an effect on many readers.

So instead of being hurt by the negative feedback–which I am, sometimes, because I’m human–I try to take pride in the fact that my words compelled someone to take action. That means my voice is a pretty powerful thing. After all, not taking action is the easiest thing in the world.

There is strength in numbers.

That’s a lesson I learned after the presidential election, when scores of people banded together in their shared anger, sorrow, and disbelief. Since the election, I’ve joined several online groups that facilitate taking focused action and creating change. I’ve been part of small-scale changes already. But every large-scale change is the product of many small decisions; it’s the sum total of thousands of people making the choice to take action, over and over again. And in the end, doing my part is all I can do.

So that’s where I’m focused, heading into 2017: on taking action whenever and wherever I can. Some of that action will be shaping this blog in new ways–stayed tuned for posts outlining my 2017 Word of the Year and blogging goals next week.

Here’s looking forward to a new year filled with possibilities!