5 Baby Steps for Taking a Social Media Hiatus

I spent very little time on social media during the week Mike and I spent in Antigua. We had access to free WiFi, but taking a social media hiatus was part of my plan and I stuck to it (most of the time.) Which wasn’t hard, because Antigua.

But it was also part of my plan to stay offline this summer as much as possible. I’d intended to use our trip to Antigua as a springboard for a return to spending more time in the actual world, using social media only for blog-related purposes.

That part of my plan didn’t take. Not at all. Both Mike and I dove into our phones the minute we got through Customs in Miami.

The idea of taking a social media hiatus was still rolling around in the back of my mind, though. I found myself feeling more and more fed up with Facebook–tired of seeing people giving unsolicited advice, chastising their friends under the guise of offering support (“Do whatever you want! Why do you care what other people think?”), or commenting on situations they knew very little about. Worse yet, I found myself becoming that person far too often.

Sometimes, friends, I think we’re just a few lions short of the Colosseum.

So I decided to take a few baby steps in the opposite direction–and I’m already feeling better. If you want to turn away from social media but are finding it difficult, perhaps these steps will help you too.

1. Don’t tell anybody what you’re doing.

I’ve been gradually inching away from Facebook. To my knowledge, no one has been aware of this. At least, no one has said anything. Had I announced my intentions ahead of time, I’m pretty sure half a dozen people would have encouraged me not to. (See “unsolicited advice,” above.) Then I would have felt bad about doing what I needed to do. So skip the guilt trip and proceed to Step 2.

2. Give yourself one goal at a time.

My first goal was to spend less actual time on Facebook. I accomplished this by simply leaving my phone in places where it wasn’t immediately accessible–for instance, I left it in the bedroom rather than on the end table beside me in the living room. Others have accomplished this goal by taking the Facebook app off their phones, or by moving it to the second screen and disabling notifications. Since my children are grown and it’s not imperative that I have my phone with me at all times, leaving it somewhere slightly out of the way isn’t a problem.

My second goal was to post fewer Facebook status updates. I’m still posting links my friends might find interesting (and the occasional funny meme), but this small step has already changed the way I think–I’m not constantly shaping my life into status-worthy sentences.  I’m just living.

3. Recognize the problems specific to various types of social media.

Facebook leaves me feeling disheartened about the nature of humanity. Twitter leads me to mindless reading of things I would never ordinarily come across. Pinterest prods me along mental pathways I don’t typically frequent. (For instance: I have no desire to build or purchase a dream house. Nevertheless, I have a Pinterest board labeled Dreaming that is filled with photos of kitchens and living rooms. Why? Your guess is as good as mine.)

As you’re taking your goals one at a time, realize that they may not apply across the board. I use Twitter for posting links to new material on She Dwells, but I do that via an automatic scheduling app. I also post occasional links to fellow bloggers’ posts–and that’s about the only time I log in on my own. The “no personal status updates” rule I’ve applied to Facebook, then, does not allow me to make any progress in walking away from Twitter. On the other hand, the “less time online” rule does.

4. Think of your hiatus as a recalibration, not a trip to rehab.

One of the reasons I’m calling this a hiatus, not a detox, is that I presume it will be temporary. I know myself well enough to recognize that I’ll slide back into some lazy habits. I also know that, as a blogger, I need to make use of social media–giving up on it altogether just isn’t possible.

A hiatus is a pause, not a full stop. I’m trying to teach myself how to pause certain behaviors for my own well-being.

Had I tried to go cold turkey on all social media, I’m confident that I would have failed. I’m also not convinced that my ultimate goal is to give up Facebook, or Twitter, or Pinterest. Each of them serves a purpose in my life. The point of this hiatus is to ingest less of the negativity Facebook serves up and recalibrate my behavior. I want to be more intentional about when and why I’m using social media. I want to learn to better utilize it as a tool and spend less time using it as passive entertainment that isn’t good for my soul.

5. Have an emergency plan. 

This is primarily important so that you don’t obsess about what you’re missing. (It’s easy to use that as an excuse for logging in.)

Anyone who might actually need to contact me in an emergency knows how to do that by email, phone call, or text. None of those pathways involves social media. But if you’re really concerned about missing out on something, let a trusted friend or family member know about your hiatus and ask them to keep you apprised of anything important. Be specific about what “important” means, so you aren’t wondering whether your definitions match. The more you can do to put social media out of mind entirely, the more effective your hiatus will be.

 

In the time that I’ve been on hiatus, I’ve found myself spending more time on the creative activities I enjoy–mostly because I’m making time for them. I’ve also been feeling more focused and less disheartened about life in general. So, while I know there are many good things about social media, I’m sold on the benefits of a hiatus.

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